George Peele

The Old Wife’s Tale

Peele, George. The Old Wives Tale. In: Brooke, C. F. Tucker; Paradise, N. B. (ed.) English Drama 1580-1642. Boston: D. C. Heath and Co., 1933, 23-37.

Joan Oleza Simó (Investigador principal) Tronch Pérez, Jesus (Editor)

English · Verso · 278 versos

https://playcode.fly.dev/plays/EMOTHE0300_TheOldWifesTale

Tiempo histórico
Tiempo maravilloso (intemporal)
Datación

1592; posterior 1588 y anterior 1595

Bibliografía

Ediciones modernas

Bibliografía crítica

Traducciones

Français

Deutsch

Note on this digital edition

With the support of research project GVAICO2016-094, funded by Generalitat Valenciana (2016-2017). For this digital edition, the following alerations have been made with respect to Brooke and Paradise’s edition: the play’s title has be modernized as The Old Wife’s Tale ; speech prefixes have been expanded, as has the name “ Huan. ” in a stage direction on page 32; the speech prefix “[ Voice .]” at line 910 (page 35) has been corrected to “[2 Voice .]” in order to avoid the repetion of “ Voice .” in line 905.

[DRAMATIS PERSONAE

ANTIC }
FROLIC }
FANTASTIC } Pages
CLUNCH a Smith
MADGE his Old Wife
CALYPHA }
THELEA } Brothers, seeking Delia, their sister
ERESTUS the Old Man at the Cross
LAMPRISCUS a Countryman
HUANEBANGO a Braggart
COREBUS, or BOOBY the Clown
SACRAPANT a Magician
EUMENIDES a Wandering Knight, in love with Delia
WIGGEN a Parish Unthrift
STEVEN LOACH a Churchwarden
DELIA Daughter of the King of Thessaly
VENELIA Betrothed to Erestus
ZANTIPPA }
CELANTA } Daughters of Lampriscus
A Friar
a Sexton
Voice from Well of Life
Ghost of Jack
Hostess
Harvesters
two Furies
Fiddlers
Both
ALL
ALL
Churchwarden, Sexton
ALL
(Enter Antic, Frolic, and Fantastic)
Antic
How now, fellow Frolic! What, all amort? Doth this sadness become thy madness? What though we have lost our way in the woods, yet never hang the head as though thou hadst no hope to live till to-morrow; for Fantastic and I will warrant thy life to-night for twenty in the hundred.
Frolic
Antic and Fantastic, as I am frolic franion, never in all my life was I so dead slain. What, to lose our way in the wood, without either fire or candle, so uncomfortable! O cælum! O terra! O Maria! O Neptune!
Fantastic
Why makes thou it so strange, seeing Cupid hath led our young master to the fair lady, and she is the only saint that he hath sworn to serve?
Frolic
What resteth, then, but we commit him to his wench, and each of us take his stand up in a tree, and sing out our ill fortune to the tune of " O man in desperation "?
Antic
Desperately spoken, fellow frolic, in the dark; but seeing it falls out thus, let us rehearse the old proverb:
"Three merry men, and three merry men, 24
And three merry men be we; 25
I in the wood, and thou on the ground, 26
And Jack sleeps in the tree." 27
Fantastic
Hush! a dog in the wood, or a wooden dog! O comfortable hearing! I had even as lief the chamberlain of the White Horse had called me up to bed.
Frolic
Either hath this trotting cur gone out of his circuit, or else are we near some village, which should not be far off, for I perceive the glimmering of a glow-worm, a candle, or a cat's eye, my life for a halfpenny! Enter [Clunch] a smith, with a lantern and candle In the name of my own father, be thou ox or ass that appearest, tell us what thou art.
Smith
What am I? Why, I am Clunch the smith. What are you? What make you in my territories at this time of the night?
Antic
What do we make, dost thou ask? Why, we make faces for fear; such as if thy mortal eyes could behold, would make thee water the long seams of thy side slops, smith.
Frolic
And, in faith, sir, unless your hospitality do relieve us, we are like to wander, with a sorrowful heigh-ho, among the owlets and hobgoblins of the forest. Good Vulcan, for Cupid's sake that hath cozened us all, befriend us as thou mayst; and command us howsoever, wheresoever, whensoever, in whatsoever, for ever and ever.
Smith
Well, masters, it seems to me you have lost your way in the wood; in consideration whereof, if you will go with Clunch to his cottage, you shall have house-room and a good fire to sit by, although we have no bedding to put you in.
All
O blessed smith, O bountiful Clunch!
Smith
For your further entertainment, it shall be as it may be, so and so. (Here a dog bark.) Hark! this is Ball my dog, that bids you all welcome in his own language. Come, take heed for stumbling on the threshold. – Open door, Madge; take in guests.
(Enter old woman [Madge])
Madge
Welcome, Clunch, and good fellows all, that come with my good man. For my good man's sake, come on, sit down; here is a piece of cheese, and a pudding of my own making.
Antic
Thanks, gammer; a good example for the wives of our town.
Frolic
Gammer, thou and thy good man sit lovingly together; we come to chat, and not to eat.
Smith
Well, masters, if you will eat nothing, take away. Come, what do we to pass away the time? Lay a crab in the fire to roast for lamb's-wool. What, shall we have a game at trump or ruff to drive away the time? How say you?
Fantastic
This smith leads a life as merry as a king with Madge his wife. Sirrah Frolic, I am sure thou art not without some round or other; no doubt but Clunch can bear his part.
Frolic
Else think you me ill brought up; so set to it when you will.
(They sing.)
(SONG)
Whenas the rye reach to the chin, 90
And chopcherry, chopcherry ripe within, 91
Strawberries swimming in the cream, 92
And school-boys playing in the stream; 93
Then, O, then, O, then, O, my true-love said, 94
Till that time come again 95
She could not live a maid. 96
Antic
This sport does well; but methinks, gammer, a merry winter's tale would drive away the time trimly. Come, I am sure you are not without a score.
Fantastic
I' faith, gammer, a tale of an hour long were as good as an hour's sleep.
Frolic
Look you, gammer, of the giant and the king's daughter, and I know not what. I have seen the day, when I was a little one, you might have drawn me a mile after you with such a discourse.
Madge
Well, since you be so importunate, my good man shall fill the pot and get him to bed; they that ply their work must keep good hours. One of you go lie with him; he is a clean-skinned man, I tell you, without either spavin or wind-gall: so I am content to drive away the time with an old wives' winter's tale.
Fantastic
No better hay in Devonshire; o' my word, gammer, I'll be one of your audience.
Frolic
And I another, that's flat.
Antic
Then must I to bed with the good man. – Bonna nox , gammer. – Good night, Frolic.
Smith
Come on, my lad, thou shalt take thy unnatural rest with me.
(Exeunt Antic and the Smith.)
Frolic
Yet this vantage shall we have of them in the morning, to be ready at the sight thereof extempore.
Madge
Now this bargain, my masters, must I make with you, that you will say hum and ha to my tale; so shall I know you are awake.
Both
Content, gammer, that will we do.
Madge
Once upon a time, there was a king, or a lord, or a duke, that had a fair daughter, the fairest that ever was, as white as snow and as red as blood; and once upon a time his daughter was stolen away; and he sent all his men to seek out his daughter; and he sent so long, that he sent all his men out of his land.
Frolic
Who dressed his dinner, then?
Madge
Nay, either hear my tale, or kiss my tale.
Fantastic
Well said! On with your tale, gammer.
Madge
O Lord, I quite forgot! There was a conjurer, and this conjurer could do any thing, and he turned himself into a great dragon, and carried the king's daughter away in his mouth to a castle that he made of stone; and there he kept her I know not how long, till at last all the king's men went out so long that her two brothers went to seek her. O, I forget! she (he, I would say,) turned a proper young man to a bear in the night, and a man in the day, and keeps by a cross that parts three several ways; and he made his lady run mad – Gods me bones, who comes here?
(Enter the Two Brothers)
Frolic
Soft, gammer, here some come to tell your tale for you.
Fantastic
Let them alone; let us hear what they will say.
1 Brother
Upon these chalky cliffs of Albion 159
We are arrived now with tedious toil; 160
And compassing the wide world round about, 161
To seek our sister, to seek fair Delia forth, 162
Yet cannot we so much as hear of her. 163
2 Brother
O fortune cruel, cruel and unkind! 164
Unkind in that we cannot find our sister, 165
Our sister, hapless in her cruel chance! 166
Soft! who have we here? 167
(Enter Senex [Erestus] at the cross, stooping to gather)
1 Brother
Now, father, God be your speed! What do you gather there?
Erestus
Hips and haws, and sticks and straws, and things that I gather on the ground, my son.
1 Brother
Hips and haws, and sticks and straws! Why, is that all your food, father?
Erestus
Yea, son.
2 Brother
Father, here is an alms-penny for me; and if I speed in that I go for, I will give thee as good a gown of grey as ever thou diddest wear.
1 Brother
And, father, here is another alms- penny for me; and if I speed in my journey, I will give thee a palmer's staff of ivory, and a scallop-shell of beaten gold.
Erestus
Was she fair?
2 Brother
Ay, the fairest for white, and the purest for red, as the blood of the deer, or the driven snow.
Erestus
Then hark well, and mark well, my old spell:
Be not afraid of ever stranger; 190
Start not aside at every danger; 191
Things that seem are not the same; 192
Blow a blast at every flame: 193
For when one flame of fire goes out, 194
Then comes your wishes well about: 195
If any ask who told you this good, 196
Say, the white bear of England's wood. 197
1 Brother
Brother, heard you not what the old man said?
"Be not afraid of every stranger; 200
Start not aside for every danger; 201
Things that seem are not the same; 202
Blow a blast at every flame; 203
If any ask who told you this good, 204
Say, the white bear of England's wood." 205
2 Brother
Well, if this do us any good, 206
Well fare the white bear of England's wood! 207
(Exeunt [the Two Brothers].)
Erestus
Now sit thee here, and tell a heavy tale, 208
Sad in thy mood, and sober in thy cheer; 209
Here sit thee now, and to thyself relate 210
The hard mishap of thy most wretched state. 211
In Thessaly I liv'd in sweet content, 212
Until that fortune wrought my overthrow; 213
For there I wedded was unto a dame, 214
That liv'd in honour, virtue, love, and fame. 215
But Sacrapant, that cursed sorcerer, 216
Being besotted with my beauteous love, 217
My dearest love, my true betrothed wife, 218
Did seek the means to rid me of my life. 219
But worse than this, he with his chanting spells 220
Did turn me straight unto an ugly bear; 221
And when the sun doth settle in the west, 222
Then I begin to don my ugly hide. 223
And all the day I sit, as now you see, 224
And speak in riddles, all inspir'd with rage, 225
Seeming an old and miserable man, 226
And yet I am in April of my age. 227
(Enter Venelia his lady, mad; and goes in again.)
See where Venelia, my betrothed love, 228
Runs madding, all enrag'd, about the woods, 229
All by his cursed and enchanting spells. – 230
(Enter Lampriscus with a pot of honey)
But here comes Lampriscus, my discontented neighbour. How now, neighbour! You look toward the ground as well as I; you muse on something.
Lampriscus
Neighbour, on nothing but on the matter I so often moved to you. If you do anything for charity, help me; if for neighbourhood or brotherhood, help me: never was one so cumbered as is poor Lampriscus; and to begin, I pray receive this pot of honey, to mend your fare.
Erestus
Thanks, neighbour, set it down; honey is always welcome to the bear. And now, neighbour, let me hear the cause of your coming.
Lampriscus
I am, as you know, neighbour, a man unmarried; and lived so unquietly with my two wives, that I keep every year holy the day wherein I buried them both: the first was on Saint Andrew's day, the other on Saint Luke's.
Erestus
And now, neighbour, you of this country say, your custom is out. But on with your tale, neighbour.
Lampriscus
By my first wife, whose tongue wearied me alive, and sounded in my ears like the clapper of a great bell, whose talk was a continual torment to all that dwelt by her or lived nigh her, you have heard me say I had a handsome daughter.
Erestus
True, neighbour.
Lampriscus
She it is that afflicts me with her continual clamours, and hangs on me like a bur. Poor she is, and proud she is; as poor as a sheep new-shorn, and as proud of her hopes as a peacock of her tail well-grown.
Erestus
Well said, Lampriscus! You speak it like an Englishman.
Lampriscus
As curst as a wasp, and as forward as a child new-taken from the mother's teat; she is to my age as smoke to the eyes or as vinegar to the teeth.
Erestus
Holily praised, neighbour. As much for the next.
Lampriscus
By my other wife I had a daughter so hard-favoured, so foul and ill-faced, that I think a grove full of golden trees, and the leaves of rubies and diamonds, would not be a dowry answerable to her deformity.
Erestus
Well, neighbour, now you have spoke, hear me speak. Send them to the well for the water of life; there shall they find their fortunes unlooked for. Neighbour, farewell.
(Exit.)
Lampriscus
Farewell, and a thousand! And now goeth poor Lampriscus to put in execution this excellent counsel.
(Exit.)
Frolic
Why, this goes round without a fiddling- stick: but, do you hear, gammer, was this the man that was a bear in the night and a man in the day?
Madge
Ay, this is he; and this man that came to him was a beggar, and dwelt upon a green. But soft! who comes here? O, these are the harvest-men. Ten to one they sing a song of mowing.
(Enter the Harvest-men a-singing, with this song double repeated)
All ye that lovely lovers be, 296
Pray you for me. 297
Lo, here we come a-sowing, a-sowing, 298
And sow sweet fruits of love; 299
In your sweet hearts well may it prove! 300
(Exeunt.)
(Enter Huanebango with his two-hand sword, and Booby, the clown)
Fantastic
Gammer, what is he?
Madge
O, this is one that is going to the conjurer. Let him alone; hear what he says.
Huanebango
Now, by Mars and Mercury, Jupiter and Janus, Sol and Saturnus, Venus and Vesta, Pallas and Proserpina, and by the honour of my house, Polimackeroeplacidus, it is a wonder to see what this love will make silly fellows adventure, even in the wane of their wits and infancy of their discretion. Alas, my friend! what fortune calls thee forth to seek thy fortune among brazen gates, enchanted towers, fire and brimstone, thunder and lightning? Beauty, I tell thee, is peerless, and she precious whom thou affectest. Do off these desires, good countryman; good friend, run away from thyself; and, so soon as thou canst, forget her, whom none must inherit but he that can monsters tame, labours achieve, riddles absolve, loose enchantments, murther magic, and kill conjuring, –and that is the great and mighty Huanebango.
Booby
Hark you, sir, hark you. First know I have here the flurting feather, and have given the parish the start for the long stock: now, sir, if it be no more but running through a little lightning, and thunder, and "riddle me, riddle me what's this?" I'll have the wench from the conjurer, if he were ten conjurers.
Huanebango
I have abandoned the court and honourable company, to do my devoir against this sore sorcerer and mighty magician: if this lady be so fair as she is said to be, she is mine, she is mine; meus, mea, meum, in contemptum omnium grammaticorum.
Booby
O falsum Latinum! The fair maid is minum , Cum apurtinantibus gibletis and all.
Huanebango
If she be mine, as I assure myself the heavens will do somewhat to reward my worthiness, she shall be allied to none of the meanest gods, but be invested in the most famous stock of Huanebango, – Polimackeroeplacidus my grandfather, my father Pergopolineo, my mother Dionora de Sardinia, famously descended.
Booby
Do you hear, sir? Had not you a cousin that was called Gusteceridis?
Huanebango
Indeed, I had a cousin that sometime followed the court infortunately, and his name Bustegusteceridis.
Booby
O Lord, I know him well! He is the knight of the neat's-feet.
Huanebango
O, he loved no capon better! He hath oftentimes deceived his boy of his dinner; that was his fault, good Bustegusteceridis.
Booby
Come, shall we go along? [Enter Erestus at the cross] Soft! here is an old man at the cross; let us ask him the way thither. – Ho, you gaffer! I pray you tell where the wise man the conjurer dwells.
Huanebango
Where that earthly goddess keepeth her abode, the commander of my thoughts, and fair mistress of my heart.
Erestus
Fair enough, and far enough from thy fingering, son.
Huanebango
I will follow my fortune after mine own fancy, and do according to mine own discretion.
Erestus
Yet give something to an old man before you go.
Huanebango
Father, methinks a piece of this cake might serve your turn.
Erestus
Yea, son.
Huanebango
Huanebango giveth no cakes for alms; ask of them that give gifts for poor beggars. – Fair lady, if thou wert once shrined in this bosom, I would buckler thee haratantara.
(Exit.)
Booby
Father, do you see this man? You little think he'll run a mile or two for such a cake, or pass for a pudding. I tell you, father, he has kept such a begging of me for a piece of this cake! Whoo! he comes upon me with "a superfantial substance, and the foison of the earth," that I know not what he means. If he came to me thus, and said, "My friend Booby," or so, why, I could spare him a piece with all my heart; but when he tells me how God hath enriched me above other fellows with a cake, why, he makes me blind and deaf at once. Yet, father, here is a piece of cake for you, as hard as the world goes.
([Gives cake.])
Erestus
Thanks, son, but list to me; 394
He shall be deaf when thou shalt not see. 395
Farewell, my son: things may so hit, 396
Thou mayst have wealth to mend thy wit. 397
Booby
Farewell, father, farewell; for I must make haste after my two-hand sword that is gone before.
(Exeunt omnes.)
(Enter Sacrapant in his study)
Sacrapant
The day is clear, the welkin bright and grey, 401
The lark is merry and records her notes; 402
Each thing rejoiceth underneath the sky, 403
But only I, whom heaven hath in hate, 404
Wretched and miserable Sacrapant. 405
In Thessaly was I born and brought up; 406
My mother Meroe hight, a famous witch, 407
And by her cunning I of her did learn 408
To change and alter shapes of mortal men. 409
There did I turn myself into a dragon, 410
And stole away the daughter to the king, 411
Fair Delia, the mistress of my heart; 412
And brought her hither to revive the man 413
That seemeth young and pleasant to behold, 414
And yet is aged, crooked, weak, and numb. 415
Thus by enchanting spells I do deceive 416
Those that behold and look upon my face; 417
But well may I bid youthful years adieu. 418
(Enter Delia with a pot in her hand)
See where she comes from whence my sorrows grow! How now, fair Delia! where have you been?
Delia
At the foot of the rock for running water, and gathering roots for your dinner, sir.
Sacrapant
Ah, Delia, fairer art thou than the running water, yet harder far than steel or adamant!
Delia
Will it please you to sit down, sir?
Sacrapant
Ay, Delia, sit and ask me what thou wilt, Thou shalt have it brought into thy lap.
Delia
Then, I pray you, sir, let me have the best meat from the King of England's table, and the best wine in all France, brought in by the veriest knave in all Spain.
Sacrapant
Delia, I am glad to see you so pleasant. 433
Well, sit thee down. – 434
Spread, table, spread, 435
Meat, drink, and bread, 436
Ever may I have 437
What I ever crave, 438
When I am spread, 439
For meat for my black cock, 440
And meat for my red. 441
(Enter a Friar with a chine of beef and a pot of wine)
Here, Delia, will ye fall to?
Delia
Is this the best meat in England?
Sacrapant
Yea.
Delia
What is it?
Sacrapant
A chine of English beef, meat for a king and a king's followers.
Delia
Is this the best wine in France?
Sacrapant
Yea.
Delia
What wine is it?
Sacrapant
A cup of neat wine of Orleans, that never came near the brewers in England.
Delia
Is this the veriest knave in all Spain?
Sacrapant
Yea.
Delia
What is he, a friar?
Sacrapant
Yea, a friar indefinite, and a knave infinite.
Delia
Then, I pray ye, Sir Friar, tell me before you go, which is the most greediest Englishman?
Friar
The miserable and most covetous usurer.
Sacrapant
Hold thee there, friar. Exit Friar. But soft! Who have we here? Delia, away, begone!
(Enter the Two Brothers)
Delia, away! for beset are we. – 465
But heaven nor hell shall rescue her for me. 466
([Exeunt Delia and Sacrapant.])
1 Brother
Brother, was not that Delia did appear, 467
Or was it but her shadow that was here? 468
2 Brother
Sister, where art thou? Delia come again! 469
He calls, that of thy absence doth complain. – 470
Call out, Calypha, that she may hear, 471
And cry aloud, for Delia is near. 472
Echo
Near.
1 Brother
Near! O, where? Hast thou any tidings?
Echo
Tidings.
2 Brother
Which way is Delia, then; or that, or this?
Echo
This.
1 Brother
And may we safely come where Delia is?
Echo
Yes.
2 Brother
Brother, remember you the white bear of England's wood?
"Start not aside for every danger, 482
Be not afeard of every stranger; 483
Things that seem are not the same." 484
1 Brother
Brother, why do we not, then, courageously enter?
2 Brother
Then, brother, draw thy sword and follow me.
(Enter [Sacrapant] the Conjurer: it lightens and thunders; the 2. Brother falls down.)
1 Brother
What, brother, dost thou fall?
Sacrapant
Ay, and thou too, Calypha. Fall 1. Brother. Enter Two Furies Adeste, dæmones! Away with them:
Go carry them straight to Sacrapanto's cell, 492
There in despair and torture for to dwell. 493
([Exeunt Furies with the Two Brothers.])
These are Thenores' sons of Thessaly, 494
That come to seek Delia their sister forth; 495
But, with a potion I to her have given, 496
My arts have made her to forget herself. 497
(He removes a turf, and shows a light in a glass.)
See here the thing which doth prolong my life. 498
With this enchantment I do any thing; 499
And till this fade, my skill shall still endure, 500
And never none shall break this little glass, 501
But she that's neither wife, widow, nor maid. 502
Then cheer thyself; this is thy destiny, 503
Never to die but by a dead man's hand. 504
(Exit.)
(Enter Eumenides, the wandering knight, and [Erestus] the old man at the cross)
Eumenides
Tell me, Time, 505
Tell me, just Time, when shall I Delia see? 506
When shall I see the loadstar of my life? 507
When shall my wand'ring course end with her sight, 508
Or I but view my hope, my heart's delight? 509
[Seeing Erestus] Father, God speed! If you tell fortunes, I pray, good father, tell me mine.
Erestus
Son, I do see in thy face 512
Thy blessed fortune work apace. 513
I do perceive that thou hast wit; 514
Beg of thy fate to govern it, 515
For wisdom govern'd by advice, 516
Makes many fortunate and wise. 517
Bestow thy alms, give more than all, 518
Till dead men's bone come at thy call. 519
Farewell, my son! Dream of no rest, 520
Till thou repent that thou didst best. 521
(Exit Old Man.)
Eumenides
This man hath left me in a labyrinth:
He biddeth me give more than all, 523
"Till dead men's bones come at thy call"; 524
He biddeth me dream of no rest, 525
Till I repent that I do best. 526
([Lies down and sleeps.])
(Enter Wiggen, Corebus, Churchwarden, and Sexton)
Wiggen
You may be ashamed, you whoreson scald Sexton and Churchwarden, if you had any shame in those shameless faces of yours, to let a poor man lie so long above ground unburied. A rot on you all, that have no more compassion of a good fellow when he is gone!
Churchwarden
What, would you have us to bury him, and to answer it ourselves to the parish?
Sexton
Parish me no parishes; pay me my fees, and let the rest run on in the quarter's accounts, and put it down for one of your good deeds, o' God's name! for I am not one that curiously stands upon merits.
Corebus
You whoreson, sodden-headed sheep's-face, shall a good fellow do less service and more honesty to the parish, and will you not, when he is dead, let him have Christmas burial?
Wiggen
Peace, Corebus! As sure as Jack was Jack, the frolic'st franion amongst you, and I, Wiggen, his sweet sworn brother, Jack shall have his funerals, or some of them shall lie on God's dear earth for it, that's once.
Churchwarden
Wiggen, I hope thou wilt do no more than thou dar'st answer.
Wiggen
Sir, sir, dare or dare not, more or less, answer or not answer, do this, or have this.
Sexton
Help, help, help!
(Wiggen sets upon the parish with a pike-staff.)
(Eumenides awakes and comes to them)
Eumenides
Hold thy hands, good fellow.
Corebus
Can you blame him, sir, if he take Jack's part against this shake-rotten parish that will not bury Jack?
Eumenides
Why, what was that Jack?
Corebus
Who, Jack, sir? Who, our Jack, sir? As good a fellow as ever trod upon neat's-leather.
Wiggen
Look you, sir; he gave fourscore and nineteen mourning gowns to the parish when he died, and because he would not make them up a full hundred, they would not bury him: was not this good dealing?
Churchwarden
O Lord, sir, how he lies! He was not worth a halfpenny, and drunk out every penny; and now his fellows, his drunken companions would have us to bury him at the charge of the parish. An we make many such matches, we may pull down the steeple, sell the bells, and thatch the chancel. He shall lie above ground till he dance a galliard about the church-yard, for Steven Loach.
Wiggen
Sic argumentaris, Domine Loach: – "an we make many such matches, we may pull down the steeple, sell the bells, and thatch the chancel!" – in good time, sir, and hang yourselves in the bell-ropes, when you have done. Domine opponens, præpono tibi hanc quæstionem , whether will you have the ground broken or your pates broken first? For one of them shall be done presently, and to begin mine, I'll seal it upon your coxcomb.
Eumenides
Hold thy hands, I pray thee, good fellow; be not too hasty.
Corebus
You capon's face, we shall have you turned out of the parish one of these days, with never a tatter to your arse; then you are in worse taking than Jack.
Eumenides
Faith, and he is bad enough. This fellow does but the part of a friend, to seek to bury his friend. How much will bury him?
Wiggen
Faith, about some fifteen or sixteen shillings will bestow him honestly.
Sexton
Ay, even thereabouts, sir.
Eumenides
– and I have left me but one poor three half-pence. Now do I remember the words the old man spake at the cross, "Bestow all thou hast," and this is all, "till dead men's bones comes at thy call."
Wiggen
God, and all good, be with you, sir! [Exit Eumenides.] Nay, you cormorants, I'll bestow one peal of Jack at mine own proper costs and charges.
Corebus
You may thank God the long staff and the bilbo-blade crossed not your coxcomb.– Well, we'll to the church-stile and have a pot, and so trill-lill.
Churchwarden, Sexton
Come, let's go.
(Exeunt.)
Fantastic
But, hark you, gammer, methinks this Jack bore a great sway in the parish.
Madge
O, this Jack was a marvellous fellow! he was but a poor man, but very well beloved. You shall see anon what this Jack will come to.
(Enter the Harvest-men singing, with women in their hands)
Frolic
Soft! who have we here? Our amorous harvesters.
Fantastic
Ay, ay, let us sit still, and let them alone.
(Here they begin to sing, the song doubled)
Lo, here we come a-reaping, a-reaping, 623
To reap our harvest-fruit! 624
And thus we pass the year so long, 625
And never be we mute. 626
(Exeunt the Harvest-men.)
(Enter Huanebango and [a little later] Corebus, the clown)
Frolic
Soft! who have we here?
Madge
O, this is a choleric gentleman! All you that love your lives, keep out of the smell of his two-hand sword. Now goes he to the conjurer.
Fantastic
Methinks the conjurer should put the fool into a juggling-box.
Huanebango
Fee, fa, fum, 634
Here is the Englishman. – 635
Conquer him that can, – 636
Came for his lady bright, 637
To prove himself a knight, 638
And win her love in fight. 639
Corebus
Who-haw, Master Bango, are you here? Hear you, you had best sit down here, and beg an alms with me.
Huanebango
Hence, base cullion! Here is he that commandeth ingress and egress with his weapon, and will enter at his voluntary, whosoever saith no.
(A voice and flame of fire; Huanebango falleth down)
Voice
No.
Madge
So with that they kissed, and spoiled the edge of as good a two-hand sword as ever God put life in. Now goes Corebus in, spite of the conjurer.
(Enter [Sacrapant] the Conjurer and [Two Furies and] strike Corebus blind)
Sacrapant
Away with him into the open fields, 652
To be a ravening prey to crows and kites: 653
([Huanabengo is carried out by the Two Furies.])
And for this villain, let him wander up and down, 654
In naught but darkness and eternal night. 655
Corebus
Here hast thou slain Huan, a slashing knight, 656
And robbed poor Corebus of his sight. 657
(Exit.)
Sacrapant
Hence, villain, hence! – Now I have unto Delia 658
Given a potion of forgetfulness, 659
That, when she comes, she shall not know her brothers. 660
Lo, where they labour, like to country slaves, 661
With spade and mattock on this enchanted ground! 662
Now will I call her by another name; 663
For never shall she know herself again, 664
Until that Sacrapant hath breath'd his last. 665
See where she comes. 666
(Enter Delia)
Come hither, Delia, take this goad; here hard 667
At hand two slaves do work and dig for gold: 668
Gore them with this, and thou shalt have enough. 669
(He gives her a goad.)
Delia
Good sir, I know not what you mean. 670
Sacrapant
She hath forgotten to be Delia, 671
But not forgot the same she should forget; 672
But I will change her name. 673
Fair Berecynthia, so this country calls you, 674
Go ply these strangers, wench; they dig for gold. 675
(Exit Sacrapant.)
Delia
O heavens, how 676
Am I beholding to this fair young man! 677
But I must ply these strangers to their work: 678
See where they come. 679
(Enter the Two Brothers in their shirts, with spades, digging)
1 Brother
O brother, see where Delia is! 680
2 Brother
O Delia, 681
Happy are we to see thee here! 682
Delia
What tell you me of Delia, prating swains? 683
I know no Delia, nor know I what you mean. 684
Ply you your work, or else you are like to smart. 685
1 Brother
Why, Delia, know'st thou not thy brothers here? 686
We come from Thessaly to seek thee forth; 687
And thou deceiv'st thyself, for thou art Delia. 688
Delia
Yet more of Delia? Then take this, and smart. 689
([Pricks them with the goad.])
What feign you shifts for to defer your labour? 690
Work, villains, work; it is for gold you dig. 691
2 Brother
Peace, brother, peace: this vild enchanter 692
Hath ravish'd Delia of her senses clean, 693
And she forgets that she is Delia. 694
1 Brother
Leave, cruel thou, to hurt the miserable. – 695
Dig, brother, dig, for she is hard as steel. 696
(Here they dig, and descry the light under a little hill.)
2 Brother
Stay, brother; what hast thou descried? 697
Delia
Away, and touch it not; it is something that my lord hath hidden there.
(She covers it again.)
(Enter Sacrapant)
Sacrapant
Well said ! thou plyest these pioneers well. – 700
Go get you in, you labouring slaves. 701
([Exeunt the Two Brothers.])
Come, Berecynthia, let us in likewise, 702
And hear the nightingale record her notes. 703
(Exeunt omnes.)
(Enter Zantippa, the curst daughter, to the Well with a pot in her hand)
Zantippa
Now for a husband, house, and home: God send a good one or none, I pray God! My father hath sent me to the well for the water of life, and tells me, if I give fair words, I shall have a husband. Enter [Celanta,] the foul wench, to the Well for water with a pot in her hand But here comes Celanta, my sweet sister. I'll stand by and hear what she says.
Celanta
My father hath sent me to the well for water, and he tells me, if I speak fair, I shall have a husband, and none of the worst. Well, though I am black, I am sure all the world will not forsake me; and, as the old proverb is, though I am black, I am not the devil.
Zantippa
Marry-gup with a murrain, I know wherefore thou speakest that: but go thy ways home as wise as thou cam'st, or I'll set thee home with a wanion.
(Here she strikes her pitcher against her sister's, and breaks them both, and goes her way.)
Celanta
I think this be the curstest quean in the world. You see what she is, a little fair, but as proud as the devil, and the veriest vixen that lives upon God's earth. Well, I'll let her alone, and go home and get another pitcher, and, for all this, get me to the well for water.
(Exit.)
(Enter two Furies out of the Conjurer's cell and lays Huanebango by the Well of Life [and then exeunt].)
(Enter Zantippa with a pitcher to the well.)
Zantippa
Once again for a husband; and, in faith, Celanta, I have got the start of you; belike husbands grow by the well-side. Now my father says I must rule my tongue. Why, alas, what am I, then? A woman without a tongue is as a soldier without his weapon. But I'll have my water, and be gone.
(Here she offers to dip her pitcher in, and a Head speaks in the well)
Head
Gently dip, but not too deep, 734
For fear you make the golden beard to weep. 735
Fair maiden, white and red, 736
Stroke me smooth, and comb my head, 737
And thou shalt have some cockell-bread. 738
Zantippa
What is this?
"Fair maiden, white and red, 740
Comb me smooth, and stroke my head, 741
And thou shalt have some cockell-bread"? 742
"Cockell" callest thou it, boy? Faith, I'll 743
give you cockell-bread. 744
(She breaks her pitcher upon his Head: then it thunders and lightens; and Huanebango rises up. Huanebango is deaf and cannot hear.)
Huanebango
Philida, phileridos, pamphilida, florida, flortos: 745
Dub dub-a-dub, bounce, quoth the guns, with a sulphurous huff-snuff: 746
Wak'd with a wench, pretty peat, pretty love, and my sweet pretty pigsnie, 747
Just by thy side shall sit surnamed great Huanebango: 748
Safe in my arms will I keep thee, threat Mars or thunder Olympus. 749
Zantippa
Foh, what greasy groom have we here? He looks as though he crept out of the backside of the well, and speaks like a drum perish'd at the west end.
Huanebango
O, that I might, – but I may not, woe to my destiny therefore! – 754
Kiss that I clasp! but I cannot. Tell me, my destiny, wherefore? 755
Zantippa
Whoop! now I have my dream.
Huanebango
I'll now set my countenance, and to her in prose, it may be, this rimram-ruff is too rude and encounter.
Zantippa
Laugh, laugh, Zantippa; thou hast thy fortune, a fool and a husband under one.
Huanebango
Truly, sweetheart, as I seem, about some twenty years, the very April of mine age.
Zantippa
Why, what a prating ass is this!
Huanebango
Her coral lips, her crimson chin, 774
Her silver teeth so white within, 775
Her golden locks, her rolling eye, 776
Her pretty parts, let them go by, 777
Heigh-ho, hath wounded me, 778
That I must die this day to see! 779
Zantippa
By Gogs-bone, thou art a flouting knave. "Her coral lips, her crimson chin"! ka, wilshaw!
Huanebango
True, my own, and my own because mine, and mine because mine, ha, ha! Above a thousand pounds in possibility, and things fitting thy desire in possession.
Zantippa
The sot thinks I ask of his lands. Lob be your comfort, and cuckold be your destiny!
Huanebango
True, sweetheart, and will royalize thy progeny with my pedigree.
(Exeunt omnes.)
(Enter Eumenides, the wandering knight)
Eumenides
Wretched Eumenides, still unfortunate, 793
Envied by fortune and forlon by fate, 794
Here pine and die, wretched Eumenides, 795
Die in the spring, the April of my age! 796
Here sit thee down, repent what thou hast done: 797
I would to God that it were ne'er begun! 798
(Enter [the Ghost of] Jack)
Jack
You are well overtaken, sir.
Eumenides
Who's that?
Jack
You are heartily well met, sir.
Eumenides
Forbear, I say; who is that which pincheth me?
Jack
Trusting in God, good Master Eumenides, that you are in so good health as all your friends were at the making hereof, God give you good morrow, sir! Lack you not a neat, handsome, and cleanly young lad, about the age of fifteen or sixteen years, that can run by your horse, and, for a need, make your mastership's shoes as black as ink? How say you, sir?
Eumenides
Alas, pretty lad, I know not how to keep myself, and much less a servant, my pretty boy; my state is so bad.
Jack
Content yourself, you shall not be so ill a master but I'll be as bad a servant. Tut, sir, I know you, though you know not me. Are not you the man, sir, – deny it if you can, sir, – that came from a strange place in the land of Catita, where Jack-an-apes flies with his tail in his mouth, to seek out a lady as white as snow and as red as blood? Ha, ha! have I touched you now?
Eumenides
I think this boy be a spirit.
Jack
Tut, are not you the man, sir, – deny it if you can, sir, – that gave all the money you had to the burying of a poor man, and but one three-half-pence left in your purse? Content you, sir, I'll serve you, that is flat.
Eumenides
Well, my lad, since thou art so importunate, I am content to entertain thee, not as a servant, but copartner in my journey. But whither shall we go? for I have not any money more than one bare three-half-pence.
Jack
Well, master, content yourself, for if my divination be not out, that shall be spent at the next inn or alehouse we come to: for, master, I know you are passing hungry; therefore I'll go before and provide dinner until that you come; no doubt but you'll come fair and softly after.
Eumenides
Ay, go before; I'll follow thee.
Jack
But do you hear, master? Do you know my name?
Eumenides
No, I promise thee, not yet.
Jack
Why, I am Jack.
(Exit [Ghost of] Jack.)
Eumenides
Jack! Why, be it so, then.
(Enter the Hostess and Jack, setting meat on the table; and Fiddlers come to play. Eumenides walketh up and down, and will eat no meat.)
Hostess
How say you, sir? Do you please to sit down?
Eumenides
Hostess, I thank you, I have no great stomach.
Hostess
Pray, sir, what is the reason your master is so strange? Doth not this meat please him?
Jack
Yes, hostess, but it is my master's fashion to pay before he eats; therefore, a reckoning, good hostess.
Hostess
Marry, shall you, sir, presently.
(Exit.)
Eumenides
Why, Jack, what dost thou mean? Thou knowest I have not any money; therefore, sweet Jack, tell me, what shall I do?
Jack
Well, master, look in your purse.
Eumenides
Why, faith, it is a folly, for I have no money.
Jack
Why, look you, master; do so much for me.
Eumenides
[looking into his purse.] Alas, Jack, my purse is full of money!
Jack
"Alas," master! does that word belong to this accident? Why, methinks I should have seen you cast away your cloak, and in a bravado danced a galliard round about the chamber. Why, master, your man can teach you more wit than this. [Re-enter Hostess] Come, hostess, cheer up my master.
Hostess
You are heartily welcome; and if it please you to eat of a fat capon, a fairer bird, a finer bird, a sweeter bird, a crisper bird, a neater bird, your worship never eat of.
Eumenides
Thanks, my fine, eloquent hostess.
Jack
But hear you, master, one word by the way. Are you content I shall be halves in all you get in your journey?
Eumenides
I am, Jack, here is my hand.
Jack
Enough, master, I ask no more.
Eumenides
Come, hostess, receive your money; and I thank you for my good entertain- ment.
([Gives money.])
Hostess
You are heartily welcome, sir.
Eumenides
Come, Jack, whither go we now?
Jack
Marry, master, to the conjurer's presently.
Eumenides
Content, Jack. – Hostess, farewell.
(Exeunt omnes.)
(Enter Corebus [blind], and Celanta, the foul wench, to the Well for water)
Corebus
Come, my duck, come: I have now got a wife. Thou art fair, art thou not?
Celanta
My Corebus, the fairest alive; make no doubt of that.
Corebus
Come, wench, are we almost at the well?
Celanta
Ay, Corebus, we are almost at the well now. I'll go fetch some water; sit down while I dip my pitcher in.
Voice
Gently dip, but not too deep, 905
For fear you make the golden beard to weep. 906
(A Head comes up with ears of corn, and she combs them in her lap)
Fair maiden, white and red, 907
Comb me smooth, and stroke my head, 908
And thou shalt have some cockell-bread. 909
[2 Voice.]
Gently dip, but not too deep, 910
For fear thou make the golden beard to weep. 911
(A [Second] Head comes up full of gold; she combs it into her lap)
Fair maid, white and red, 912
Comb me smooth, and stroke my head, 913
And every hair a sheaf shall be, 914
And every sheaf a golden tree. 915
Celanta
O, see, Corebus, I have comb'd a great deal of gold into my lap, and a great deal of corn!
Corebus
Well said, wench! now we shall have just enough. God send us coiners to coin our gold. But come, shall we go home, sweetheart?
Celanta
Nay, come, Corebus, I will lead you.
Corebus
So, Corebus, things have well hit; 923
Thou hast gotten wealth to mend thy wit. 924
(Exeunt.)
(Enter [the Ghost of] Jack and [Eumenides] the wandering knight)
Jack
Come away, master, come.
Eumenides
Go along, Jack, I'll follow thee. Jack, they say it is good to go cross-legged, and say his prayers backward; how sayest thou?
Jack
Tut, never fear, master; let me alone. Here sit you still; speak not a word; and because you shall not be enticed with his enchanting speeches, with this same wool I'll stop your ears: and so, master, sit still, for I must to the conjurer.
(Exit [Ghost of] Jack.)
(Enter [Sacrapant] the Conjurer to the wandering knight)
Sacrapant
How now! What man art thou that sits so sad? 935
Why dost thou gaze upon these stately trees 936
Without the leave and will of Sacrapant? 937
What, not a word but mum? Then, Sacrapant, 938
Thou art betray'd. 939
(Enter [the Ghost of] Jack invisible, and taketh off Sacrapant's wreath from his head, and his sword out of his hand)
What hand invades the head of Sacrapant? 940
What hateful Fury doth envy my happy state? 941
Then, Sacrapant, these are thy latest days. 942
Alas, my veins are numb'd, my sinews shrink. 943
My blood is pierc'd, my breath fleeting away, 944
And now my timeless date is come to end! 945
He in whose life his actions hath been so foul, 946
Now in his death to hell descends his soul. 947
(He dieth.)
Jack
O, sir, are you gone? Now I hope we shall have some other coil. – Now, master, how like you this? The conjurer he is dead, and vows never to trouble us more. Now get you to your fair lady, and see what you can do with her. – Alas, he heareth me not all this while; but I will help that.
(He pulls the wool out of his ears.)
Eumenides
How now, Jack? What news?
Jack
Here, master, take this sword, and dig with it at the foot of this hill.
(He digs, and spies a light [in a glass].)
Eumenides
How now, Jack? What is this?
Jack
Master, without this the conjurer could do nothing; and so long as this light lasts, so long doth his art endure, and this being out, then doth his art decay.
Eumenides
Why, then, Jack, I will soon put out this light.
Jack
Ay, master, how?
Eumenides
Why, with a stone I'll break the glass, and then blow it out.
Jack
No, master, you may as soon break the smith's anvil as this little vial; nor the biggest blast that ever Boreas blew cannot blow out this little light; but she that is neither maid, wife, nor widow. Master, wind this horn, and see what will happen. He winds the horn. Here enters Venelia, and breaks the glass, and blows out the light, and goeth in again. So, master, how like you this? This is she that ran madding in the woods, his betrothed love that keeps the cross; and now, this light being out, all are restored to their former liberty. And now, master, to the lady that you have so long looked for.
(He draweth a curtain, and there Delia sitteth asleep)
Eumenides
God speed, fair maid, sitting alone, – there is once. God speed, fair maid, – there is twice. God speed, fair maid, – that is thrice.
Delia
Not so, good sir, for you are by.
Jack
Enough, master, she hath spoke; now I will leave her with you.
([Exit.])
Eumenides
Thou fairest flower of these western parts, 987
Whose beauty so reflecteth in my sight 988
As doth a crystal mirror in the sun; 989
For thy sweet sake I have cross'd the frozen Rhine; 990
Leaving fair Po, I sail'd up Danuby 991
As far as Saba, whose enhancing streams 992
Cuts twixt the Tartars and the Russians; 993
These have I cross'd for thee, fair Delia: 994
Then grant me that which I have su'd for long. 995
Delia
Thou gentle knight, whose fortune is so good 996
To find me out and set my brothers free, 997
My faith, my heart, my hand I give to thee. 998
Eumenides
Thanks, gentle madam; but here comes Jack; thank him, for he is the best friend that we have. Enter [the Ghost of] Jack, with a head in his hand How now, Jack! What hast thou there?
Jack
Marry, master, the head of the conjurer.
Eumenides
Why, Jack, that is impossible; he was a young man.
Jack
Ah, master, so he deceived them that beheld him! But he was a miserable, old, and crooked man, though to each man's eye he seemed young and fresh; for, master, this conjurer took the shape of the old man that kept the cross, and that old man was in the likeness of the conjurer. But now, master, wind your horn.
(He winds his horn. Enter Venelia, the Two Brothers, and [Erestus] he that was at the cross)
Eumenides
Welcome, Erestus! welcome fair Venelia! 1014
Welcome, Thelea and Calypha both! 1015
Now have I her that I so long have sought; 1016
So saith fair Delia, if we have your consent. 1017
1 Brother
Valiant Eumenides, thou well deservest 1018
To have our favours; so let us rejoice 1019
That by thy means we are at liberty. 1020
Here may we joy each in other's sight, 1021
And this fair lady have her wandering knight. 1022
Jack
So, master, now ye think you have done; but I must have a saying to you. You know you and I were partners, I to have half in all you got.
Eumenides
Why, so thou shalt, Jack.
Jack
Why, then, master, draw your sword, part your lady, let me have half of her presently.
Eumenides
Why, I hope, Jack, thou dost but jest. I promised thee half I got, but not half my lady.
Jack
But what else, master? Have you not gotten her? Therefore divide her straight, for I will have half; there is no remedy.
Eumenides
Well, ere I will falsify my word unto my friend, take her all. Here, Jack, I'll give her thee.
Jack
Nay, neither more nor less, master, but even just half.
Eumenides
Before I will falsify my faith unto my friend, I will divide her. Jack, thou shalt have half.
1 Brother
Be not so cruel unto our sister, gentle knight.
2 Brother
O, spare fair Delia! She deserves np death.
Eumenides
Content yourselves; my word is passed to him. – Therefore prepare thyself, Delia, for thou must die.
Delia
Then farewell, world! Adieu, Eumenides!
(He offers to strike, and [the Ghost of ] Jack stays him)
Jack
Stay, master; it is sufficient I have tried your constancy. Do you now remember since you paid for the burying of a poor fellow?
Eumenides
Ay, very well, Jack.
Jack
Then, master, thank that good deed for this good turn; and so God be with you all!
([The Ghost of] Jack leaps down in the ground.)
Eumenides
Jack, what, art thou gone? Then farewell, Jack! – 1062
Come, brothers, and my beauteous Delia, 1063
Erestus, and thy dear Venelia, 1064
We will to Thessaly with joyful hearts. 1065
All
Agreed: we follow thee and Delia.
(Exeunt omnes [except Frolic, Fantastic, and Madge])
Fantastic
What, gammer, asleep?
Madge
By the mass, son, 't is almost day; and my windows shuts at the cock's-crow.
Frolic
Do you hear, gammer? Methinks this Jack bore a great sway amongst them.
Madge
O, man, this was the ghost of the poor man that they kept such a coil to bury; and that makes him to help the wandering knight so much. But come, let us in: we we will have a cup of ale and a toast this morning, and so depart.
Fantastic
Then you have made an end of your tale, gammer?
Madge
Yes, faith: when this was done, I took a piece of bread and cheese, and came my way; and so shall you have, too, before you go, to your breakfast.
([Exeunt.])
FINIS